The Corner House

Well, my stats went up after I did a post entitled 'Topless Barmaids'.
Seriously, though. Ian has sold his car and is now borrowing his mother's so yesterday he was ferrying us both around. After Lamorna's party he dropped us at the folk club, then proceeded to take Sandy home.
They were chatting. Can you believe what Sandy confided in him? Of course, Ian told his Mum. Sandy, apparently, has been having 'cyber-sex' with young Chinese women.
'Cyber-sex' snorted Bonnie, 'why can't he just give it it's proper name. Wanking!'

Today, Bonnie was in tidy-up mode. So she's running around, frantically hoovering and putting things away.
'Hey, these aren't mine' complained Gabriella on finding a miniscule pair of crotchless panties in the front-room'
'Who'd have thought The Wain had it in her?' marvelled Ian.
I had a look at them. Oh, dear. They looked a bit familiar.
'Erm' I said, 'I don't think they are The Wain's'.
They all looked at me, a bit gob-smacked.
'I wasn't always a size 16, you know' was all I said.

Yes, I had a nice birthday, thank you very much.
After the shopping bonanza, it was time to go to Bonnie's friends, the J's. Their daughter, Lamorna was 12 last week but her party was today because they could only book the venue for this week. A Victorian swimming pool. I tried writing some suitable descriptions in my writer's notebook but I won't bother you with them. Lamorna and friends had a great time on a bouncy water castle contraption. Pop and Pizza afterwards, and cake, naturally. Jane's lovely and she'd added my name to the birthday cake. Sandy was there, the retired teacher. The one who showed me the sights (of Manchester) a couple of months ago. I mean, he's pleasant and very gallant to both Bonnie and myself, not bad looking but - I just don't really fancy him. And later he was on about how he uses SKYPE (I think) to contact Chinese women.
Bonnie thought it slightly pervy. Sometimes, she thinks, there are reasons for men being (a) still single and (b) divorced.
Folk club night. Which I was looking forward to. And yes, Corin was there. And, oh dear, he is very handsome. Not young but you can see how beautiful he must have once been. Broad shoulders, hairy, very masculine arms and thin, long musician's hands. Gentle, sensitive, romantic. What's more we nearly managed a conversation. Coming back from the bar. One of the folkies was holding two pints 'both mine' he told us, ' I'm not driving tonight'.
'He's as bad as Bonnie' I said to Corin, 'she's not driving tonight either and she's really hitting the Bacardi'.
'Are you driving?' asked Corin.
'No, I can't drive. We're getting a taxi home'.
End of.
'It's impossible' I said to Bonnie afterwards, 'both of us are utterly incapable of forming a relationship with anyone, never mind with each other'.
I wish I still had my cat.